Understanding Your Sexual Fantasies

Are you ready to take a dive into the fascinating world of sexual fantasies? Strap in tight because we’re about to explore a dimension of desire that is often misunderstood. Sexual fantasies are those secret thoughts and scenarios that turn us on, excite our minds, and ignite our passions. They can be silly, romantic, naughty, or downright dirty – but one thing’s for certain, they’re a vital part of our sexual experience.

So, whether you have a wild imagination or have never really explored your sexual fantasies before, let’s get ready to unleash the power of your imagination and discover what really turns you on!

What are sexual fantasies?

Think of your fantasies as a full spectrum of sexual self-exploration. They can come to us in many ways, from quiet erotic thoughts to reading a spicy book or watching the hottest scenarios play out in porn – and the type of fantasy? Well, that can vary too.

What are the most common fantasies:

Power dynamics
Role play
BDSM and bondage
Group sex and threesomes
Infidelity
Voyeurism and exhibitionism

Sometimes, sexual fantasies can take us by surprise. Ever told someone you’re not particularly kinky, only to find yourself day-dreaming about getting railed behind a bar by two baddies? There’s no shame in feeling energized by something you find erotically exciting. Even when those fantasies blur the lines or seem too taboo to share, there’s just one real rule to playing (and fantasizing) safely.

If your fantasy falls within the remit of safe, sane, and consensual, it’s harmless to indulge in a little sexual escapism.

Discovering your fantasies

Thinking and talking about our sexual fantasies is a healthy thing to do, but many of us can feel shy in exploring what really turns us on. It might be that you’ve never given your subconscious sexual mind the credit it deserves or have been quite conservative about what gets you feeling hot under the collar.

If you’re just beginning to dip your toes into fantasy land, here are three ways to discover your sexual muse.

Take inspiration

Watching porn, reading a spicy book, or talking dirty with your partner can be great ways to get those more intimate fantasies fired up. Even a brief, light-hearted conversation with a friend can be enough to get those risqué juices flowing.

Fly solo

And by that, we mean masturbate. Seriously, go for it. Spending time alone with your thoughts can stir up all kinds of feelings and emotions. From intense arousal to slow seduction, playing with yourself and your kinks is a healthy way to explore your deeper, untold fantasies in the confinement of your own boundaries.

Play a fun game

Write out around 20-30 sexual fantasies onto strips of paper – then play a game with your partner. Or grab a deck of cards for a quick round of erotic pass the parcel.

Acting out your sexual fantasies

Ready to take your fantasies from mind to motion? Here are a few easy tips to make sure you and your partner have a safe and pleasurable experience.

Discuss With Your Partner

Just make sure you have an informed conversation with your special other before making the dream a reality. Ensure you’re both on the same page, both equally enthusiastic, consenting, and ready to explore.

Establish Your Boundaries

It may be that you both are keen to experiment but setting boundaries and knowing each other’s comfort levels is important to enjoying your fantasies together. Take note of each other’s feelings and check in with one another. Even if you are single and want to explore your sexual fantasies, you should never feel pressured into doing anything that might make you feel uncomfortable.

Introduce toys

Toys can be a great way to begin dipping your toes into your very own sexual fantasy-land. Life-like masturbators can imitate the real thing without risking emotional threat. Bondage toys like floggers, whips, canes and restraints are ideal for experimenting with power-play and living out those imaginative BDSM scenarios.

Role Play

If your fantasies involve being someone else or being with someone else – role play is a fantastic way to spice up your more vanilla moments. Try slipping into a sexy secretary costume to act out that intimate office scene or pull out the cuffs and truncheon for a risqué game of cops and robbers.

Protect Your Safety and Privacy

Above all else, when playing with your fantasies – stay safe. From using physical protection like condoms and contraceptives, to using safe-words as and when needed. If your fantasies include sexting, or being involved in any way online, remember you don’t have to reveal your full identity. Protect your privacy by only sharing what you are truly comfortable with.

This article was originally published on Lovehoney and has been adapted for Her World with permission.

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